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When Motherhood Hurts: The Silent Pain We Don't Talk About Enough

My favourite aunt had it. I was young back then but I could tell. At first, I thought she hated her child, she didn't want to have anything to do with her. It got really bad that she couldn't breastfeed the child. She didn't bathe her either. I saw my uncle bathe the baby from when she was 3 months old till when she was 8 months old. After several years now, I see her and her child twinning. Matching clothes, laughing, inseparable. It was then I realised that something was wrong then. She didn't hate her child. She was drowning. Thank God her husband was a medical doctor, he understood her and wore her shoes when it was hurting her the most. A similar case happened in church where a woman with a baby started misbehaving. She was biting the baby. Thank God that it was in a church where people were present. They took the child from her, and also took her for medical care.  If no one was there, the child could have died and we'd blame the woman. If you must...
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The Tumbu fly: what happens when you leave clothes outside or spread them wrongly

Disclaimer: This article is for educational purposes only and is based on personal experience. It is not a substitute for professional medical advice. If you suspect myiasis or any skin infection, please see a healthcare professional immediately. I normally watched my father turn his wet clothes to the front when spreading them outside and he would say to me: "micro organisms fly around and if they perch on the inside of the clothe and when you wear it, you're giving harm to yourself." At first, I found it insane because most people I know always turn their clothes to the back not front when spreading. Why would you show the inside?  Everyone spreads clothes with the outside showing. It looked wrong to me. And I had this habit of forgetting my clothes outside until the next day even when they were dry. I would wash, spread, and travel. Sometimes it would rain, dry again, I would still leave it there. Until a day came, I washed and spread a shirt of mine and we...

When Endurance Becomes Self-destructive in Relationships

I woke up one morning to screaming coming from my neighbors house, I was curious to know what was going on and went to spy on them. I found the husband and wife arguing seriously then suddenly the husband took out his belt, and started flogging his wife, she immediately ran away.  I was the only one who was secretly watching before some other neighbors had managed to come out of their house. The next day, I saw the lady who had been arguing with her husband with some police men and her mother.  Yet again another drama surfaced in the yard, the lady and her husband argued again and then she got slapped by him. The slap angered me, he was behaving like he didn't love his wife. No matter how bad the situation is a man should not raise his hand on a woman.  Later that evening the man was bailed out by his mother and normally since I was close to his mom I decided to visit them. His mom was just spouting rubbish, I understand since she's talking with her son but ho...

Why I Keep Seeing Widows Everywhere: Why Do Men Die Earlier Than Women?

I went to visit a friend whose dad just died. She was sad, sitting on the floor, and in her culture she was asked to shave her head. I felt her pain too, but there was nothing that could be done. The house was full, people were crying, but her mother was the one arranging things, answering calls, trying to be strong for everyone. Then today I got another news — my uncle just passed away and left his wife and kids. Death is inevitable, but it's becoming a pattern how men die earlier than women in most homes. Most people would say it's an age thing since in most homes the father is usually older than his wife, but they forget there are homes where the wife is older and yet the man still dies earlier. You look around almost every compound and you see it. Widows everywhere, but very few widowers. The women are left to carry the family after the burial. Why is it like this? Why are men leaving so early? In Nigeria and across the world, women live an average of 5 to 7 yea...

Do Porcupines Shoot their Quills? Nature’s Spiky Survivors

I went to buy some foodstuffs and on my way back I came across some Hausa men with a wooden cage by the roadside. Inside the cage were three porcupines.  It was the first time I came across such animals in real life. I was scared to pass or go near. The quills looked sharp enough to go through anything. But some kids were gathered around, laughing and trying to poke the porcupine in the cage with sticks.  Then it happened. One of the kids got poked by a quill that poked through the cage bars. He yelped and jumped back. Immediately, the men secured the cage properly and chased the kids away, shouting for them to leave the animals alone. Standing there, heart still racing, I couldn’t stop wondering: _How do porcupines live? What do they eat? Why are they covered in those dangerous spikes?_  And what I found is that the porcupine is one of nature’s most misunderstood and fascinating survivors. The Porcupine: More Than Just Spikes Porcupines are rodents. Yes, they...

How To Turn Your Phone Into An Asset, Not A Liability

My friend asked her man for an iPhone for her birthday.  Not for cruise. Not to show off.  She really needed to start content creating.  But she couldn’t because her phone camera was shallow. Blurry. Lagging.  Every time she tried to film, the video looked like it was shot in 2012.  Brands wouldn’t take her serious. Followers would scroll past.  So she told him about it. Man to man. “Babe, I need a better phone to start.” He agreed.  Then on her birthday, he opened a small shop for her instead.  She was baffled.  And the comments didn’t help.   “Why are you asking for phone? Be materialistic.”  “Use the shop money and save up to buy the phone yourself.”  “Be grateful now.” But here’s the thing nobody was saying:   For how long would she save up? By the time she had saved 800k to buy the iPhone, the passion for content creating would have died. T he trend would have passed. The momentum would be gone. ...

I Found Ants in His Urine: How to Know If You Have Diabetes?

Disclaimer: This article is for educational purposes only. It is not a substitute for professional medical advice. Please see a healthcare professional for diagnosis and treatment. I was having a gist with my brother about the numbness he kept feeling in his leg. At first, I thought maybe he had just been sitting down for too long. But then something caught my attention. During our conversation, he got up to use the guest toilet three times. And the numbness in his leg still didn’t go away. Mind you, my brother is in his mid-20s. So it definitely wasn’t an "old age" thing. Later, I went to use the same guest toilet and noticed he had forgotten to flush. But what really caught my attention were the ants that had gathered around the urine on the floor. I immediately told him to go for a blood test because he didn’t realize these could be early signs of diabetes. That day made me realize how many of us miss the warning signs of diabetes until it’s too late. If you’re...